Let’s be honest: when we hear “SEL,” most of us picture morning meetings, glitter jars, and “I statements” being practiced by 7-year-olds in a circle on a rug. And yes, social emotional learning is essential for students. But here’s the thing we don’t talk about enough: SEL for teachers.
I don’t mean that we should be better regulated or that if we just practiced more mindfulness, burnout would vanish. (Cue the collective eye roll.) I mean that we deserve social emotional support just as much as the kids in our classrooms.
And when we begin to look at SEL through an adult lens, one that includes boundaries, emotional literacy, and healthy communication, it starts to click why this work matters at every level.
What Is SEL for Teachers, Really?
Social emotional learning for adults isn’t about sitting criss-cross applesauce and meditating (although hey, if that helps, go for it). It’s about:
- Recognizing your own emotional patterns and triggers
- Navigating stress with realistic tools (not toxic positivity)
- Building trusting relationships with students and colleagues
- Communicating needs clearly, especially when things are hard
- Reflecting on how your own identity, biases, and experiences shape your teaching
In other words: SEL for teachers is the inner work that makes the outer work sustainable.
Why It Matters
If you’re thinking, This feels like one more thing on my plate, consider this: SEL isn’t extra. It’s the plate. The foundation. The thing that helps us show up day after day in a profession that demands constant emotional labor.
Research backs this up. A 2021 study published in Teaching and Teacher Education found that when teachers engaged in SEL-focused professional development, they reported lower stress, better student relationships, and greater job satisfaction.
And it’s not just about feeling better, it impacts students, too. Educators with strong SEL skills are more likely to create psychologically safe classrooms where students can thrive.
Let’s Get Practical
So, what does adult SEL look like in real life?
- Taking a beat when a student challenges you, so you respond with curiosity, not control.
- Noticing when you’re people-pleasing at the expense of your own boundaries.
- Holding space for hard conversations without internalizing every behavior as a personal failure or personal attack.
- Normalizing reflection and repair when you mess up (because we all do).
The good news? You don’t have to figure this out alone. Below are a few books that support educator SEL in real, relatable, and research-based ways.
5 Book Recommendations on SEL for Teachers
1. Permission to Feel by Marc Brackett
This is one of the most powerful reads on emotional intelligence, written by the founder of Yale’s Center for Emotional Intelligence. It’ll change the way you think about naming and navigating emotions (Also this explains my all time favorite emotional vocabulary tool, the Mood Meter, which I literally cannot teach without).
2. Onward: Cultivating Emotional Resilience in Educators by Elena Aguilar
A month-by-month guide that helps teachers reflect, build resilience, and stay grounded. If you’re emotionally exhausted (and who isn’t?), this is a great place to start.
3. The Teacher’s Guide to Self Care by Sarah Forst
This one bridges adult and student SEL beautifully. You’ll find practical frameworks for your own growth in very meaningful ways, across all the dynamic areas of our lives.
4. Embracing Adult SEL by Wendy Turner
Focused on educator well-being through an SEL lens, she tackles empathy, self awareness, self management, and more through reflection questions and provoking ways to embed SEL for students AND teachers throughout our days.
5. Their Best Behavior by Allie Szczecinski (that’s me!)
Shameless plug, but for good reason. My book is packed with strategies for addressing student behavior through a lens of compassion, restoration, and yes, educator SEL. It includes realistic case studies, tangible strategies, and a whole chapter on self-care that is intentionally NOT cheesy or shallow.
SEL for teachers is NOT self indulgent.
SEL for teachers is self-preservation. It’s also how we model emotional growth for our students. They’re watching how we respond to stress, how we handle conflict, how we own our mistakes. And they learn by seeing us do it first.
So if you’ve been feeling like you’re running on empty, this is your reminder that tending to your emotional world is not a luxury, it’s a foundational part of the work.
