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3 Ways to Support Students That Elope

Ah, student elopement. No, I don’t mean secretly getting married – that actually sounds intriguing! I mean students who run away – from the area, from the setting, from the classroom, from the building. It’s one of those behaviors we generally cannot ignore, and is incredibly disruptive to student learning.

Language matters.

For the sake of this blog post, we are calling it eloping or elopement – a more respectful way to discuss this behavior. After all that’s what it is – a behavior. I also encourage you to refrain from calling a student “a runner” – something I hear so many education teams using (Unless you’re referring to a kiddo on the cross country team!!).  As someone who formerly described students in this way – I get it. But I know better now, so I have replaced that term with saying “a student who tends to elope when _________.”

Did you catch what I did there? “A student who tends to elope when _________.” That when? That’s the secret sauce! And, the perfect intro into 3 ways you can support students that elope.



1.) Find the function.

WHY ARE THEY LEAVING?! This is the #1 most important, crucial, imperative, urgent, weighty (I could go on…) piece to this puzzle. It’s essential you find this out! Gathering your team together to conduct a well rounded Functional Behavior Assessment (FBA) will help you to parse out what the “why” is behind the eloping. Is the student escaping work demands? Are they escaping a sensory experience in the room? Are they avoiding an uncomfortable emotion? Is the student looking for adult and/or peer attention? Is the student attempting to go somewhere when they elope from the room? There are so many factors at play, and there may be more than one function. It’s crucial to know the WHY so you can put a meaningful intervention into place that will support student needs, not just block the door and trap the student in (believe me, it won’t work and will cause way more harm than good!).

2.) Find a replacement behavior – one that gives them the same or better outcome.

So you know why they’re leaving. Step number one, complete! Nice work. Next you need to find a behavior that they can engage in that replaces eloping, but still achieves the function that elopement gave them. If you just expect a student to move on and not have that need met, you’ll be so disappointed in your hard work of finding the function. Replacement behaviors are essential! Did elopement give them an “out” from working on a subject matter they don’t like? Provide some structured break opportunities where they can stop the work for a short while before returning. Did elopement provide peer attention? Build more social interaction into their day, and give them opportunities to earn preferred activity time with a friend. Did elopement provide an escape from an uncomfortable emotion, like frustration or sadness? Give students a place to retreat to in the classroom – like a calm corner. You’ll have to provide explicit instruction on how to use this area, complete with boundaries, time limitations, expectations, etc. (Just remember that it’s better to have the student IN the classroom than wandering the hallways or sidewalks outside!)


3.) Meet students with compassion upon their return.

Student’s running the halls and your one classroom paraprofessional had to follow them for 30 minutes? Yeah, that’s frustrating. It’s so hard not to take these situations personally, as student elopement can often derail entire lessons and the learning of their peers in the room. Feel that feeling! It’s okay to be frustrated, annoyed, and whatever other emotion you’re experiencing. Teaching is tough. It is important to meet that student compassionately when they make their return to your room. If they feel unwelcome, or there’s animosity from you as the teacher when they come back, it further damages your relationship with them. I also suggest debriefing the situation with the student, in a compassionate way, once everyone is de-escalated and at their baseline. Try using “think sheets” as a structured way to have a conversation, and be sure to ask questions to help you get to the root of the behavior. Compassion can take you a LONG way in extinguishing this problematic behavior.

What are your tried and true strategies for student elopement? Comment below!

Love,
Allie

 

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About Allie

About Allie

I'm Allie, a mom, author, and special educator with a passion for social emotional learning, equitable behavior practices, and trauma informed practices. I live and work in Chicago and love talking, reading, and researching about all things related to special education, racial/social justice, and behavior - as well as books, coffee, dogs, and wine! So glad you're here.

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